"He was probably here when Charleston was first developed." "It's developed?"

That was a converstation Charles and I had about Wes while waiting for an elevator at the hotel, lol.

I have mixed feelings about the trip. One the one hand, I think we performed wonderfully for the most part. The biggest highlights of the trip, for me, though, was being able to hear the Shenandoah Valley Children's Choir and the Birmingham Boy's Choir perform. I look forward to hearing the BBC sing again in May. I also got to know some people a little better, and Sam and I made a truce. Some people got to see a side of me they had never seen before. Just ask Nick and Whitney about it...on second thought, you probably shouldn't.

On the other hand, I found out some things about some people that I really didn't want to know, and now I won't look at them in the same way I had before the trip. That makes me a little sad. I also discovered that I probably won't be attending the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary...because they're choir was awful.

I will leave you with one of my favorite quotes from the trip. It was said at the last gas station we stopped at on the way home, and is about a bin of movies they had. It was between Jackie and myself.

Me: "Oh look, they're only two dollars."
Jackie: "Or you can get five for ten dollars."
Me: "Which is two dollars apiece."

Penguins!

From www.penguinwarehouse.com Question & Answer "Penguin Care" Q: What do I feed my penguin? A: Different penguins enjoy different food. Many types like to eat krill, a tiny shrimp-like creature. They also like to eat squid and fish. Penguins prefer to catch live food by diving into water and catching them with their long, pointy bills. We suggest you buy one of our many penguin care books which can provide you with additional information. Q: Do I need to keep my penguin in air conditioning? A: A very common misperception by penguin-lovers is that penguins require a cold environment to survive. In fact, most penguin species live in warmer climates and even in jungles! However, you should look into the habitat requirements for the species of penguin you are interested in. We provide many helpful penguin care books. Q: Do I need to provide a habitat for my penguin? A: Most certainly! Each penguin species requires unique habitat requirements and your home environment needs to be made suitable for a penguin before purchase of such a pet. Most penguins require a decent sized salt-water non-chlorinated pool set at an appropriate temperature. In fact, some penguin species spend as much as 75% of their life in water. If you are interested in learning more, please look into one of our many penguin care books. Q: My penguin smells! Can I bathe my penguin? A: Penguins love a good bath! Carefully inspect any shampoo or soaps used as you do not want to remove a penguin's natural oils. Q: How do you 'housebreak' a penguin? A: Like most birds, penguins are difficult (but not impossible) to paper-train. Q: Can I train my penguin? A: Of course! Train them well and teach them all the good tricks and amazing mind powers. Someday one of those smart penguins (maybe yours) will become a Jedi penguin, an elite status of wealth, power and strength in the penguin empire. Q: Can take my penguins for walks with a penguin-leash? A: Like humans, penguins also love long nice walks after meals. It helps them to digest the food inside. But be careful with penguin-leash when walking your penguin, the cost of going to penguin-doctors is not cheap these days. Q: Will my penguin try to eat my goldfish? A: Duh! Penguins love to eat fish, and goldfish is the yummiest type of fish available. So if you own a goldfish, better either give it away or (eat it first) before your penguin get his long pointy bill on it. Q: Should I expect my penguin to sleep all day? A: For the first two weeks after you get your penguin, it is expected that the penguin will be some jet lag and will need lots of rest during the day hours. After that however, the penguin should be back to an "Early Bird" and rises before the morning sun. Q: Why does my penguin keep bumping into walls? A: Penguins, like humans, are prone to eye deterioration over time. Vision correction may be necessary for your penguin's welfare. We highly suggest laser surgery correction as many penguins do not take well to eyewear. Q: Help, my penguin keeps collecting items from all over the house and is building a nest with them! A: Calm down! Let them play and leave them alone. It's a natural habit for a penguin to feel secure when they first arrive at your home. Those items from your house give the penguin a sense of security and belonging. A word of advice, be kind and buy some nice comfy pillows for your dear pet penguin and they will thank you much. Q: What if my penguin becomes ill? A: By all means, take him to your local veterinarian at once! Many veterinarians are now accepting penguins as patients and will be able to provide the best treatment for your ailing penguin.

Heart Explosion in a Bag

I realized today I shouldn't go to Wal-Mart when I'm craving something sweet to eat. I ended up spending almost $25 on sweets, including Starbucks Java Chip Icecream, Starbucks Mocha Popsicles, and Chocolate Covered Espresso Beans (the "Heart Explosion in a Bag"). I also got some Fruit Rollups, Cocoa Puffs, and Strawberries and Creame Oatmeal.

I'm sure you wanted to know my grocery list, so I thought I'd tell you.

Driving Rules of Birmingham

First you must learn to pronounce the city's name. It's "Bur-min-ham."

Driving Information:

Burminham has its own version of traffic rules... the truck with the loudest exhaust goes next at a 4-way stop. The truck with the biggest tires goes after that. (Note:Blue-haired ladies driving anything have the right-of-way anytime.)

To find anything in the city, it is required that you know where Malfunction Junction is... which is the Alpha and Omega; the beginning and the end. It's maybe one of only two "cloverleaf formation" interchanges in the world. We invented it and only one other city was stupid enough to implement it again-- Atlanta -- making them only a wee bit dumber than we are.

The morning rush hour is from 6:00 to 10:00. The evening rush hour is from 3:00 to 7:00. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning. If the term "merging delays" is ever used by the person reporting the traffic, even in passing, call in to work and tell them that you will
be at least 30 minutes late regardless of where you are in your commute.

If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be (at the very least) rear-ended, cussed out, and possibly shot. This applies to male and female drivers alike.

You must know that "I-459," "I-59," "I-20," and"I-65" are the same road. They just loop around, cutting in and out of each other's path. We think this was a ploy utilized to confuse outsiders and discourage visitors after the War of Northern Aggression.

Always, always, always, find out if it is a race or football weekend before you get on any of these highways to travel somewhere. If it is a race or football weekend, stay home. You won't be pleasantly going anywhere else.

Construction is a permanent fixture in Burminham. The barrels are moved around in the middle of the night to make the next day's driving a little more interesting.

If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them over to the shoulder immediately to let them know -- you can be sure it was "accidentally activated."

The minimum acceptable speed on "I-65" (see above) is 85 mph. Anything less is considered downright sissy. This is Alabama's state-highway-sponsored version of NASCAR -- especially during rush hour (see above) and everyone in the city is driving at once, bumper-to-bumper. If you are in the left lane and only going 70 in a 55-65 zone, you are considered a road hazard, and will be "flipped a bird" accordingly.

Do not gawk at the woman in the car beside you in traffic who is applying make-up, drinking a Diet Coke, smoking a Marlboro, and maintaining a steadyspeed of 85 mph on I-65 in rush hour traffic. If she is coming from north of Burminham, she might be packing. If she is coming from south of Burminham, she IS packing and is not afraid to use it.

Weather Information:

If it's 110 degrees, Thanksgiving could be next weekend. If it's 10-20 degrees and sleeting/snowing, then watch out. Burminham residents consider this "demolition derby" day and will be all over the roads (frontways, sideways, etc). Please proceed with caution, as you could be their next target.

Seasonal Information:

If you stick to the seats in your vehicle, it is Spring. If you need to let the car "get some air" standing next to it with the doors open for a minute before you can stick your upper body inside to crank it and get the air going, it is Summer. If you are sweating even with the windows down, driving 55 mph, it is Fall. If you finally turn the AC off and roll your windows up, it is Winter.

General Information:

Do not ever speak during the song Sweet Home Alabama unless it is to sing along with the lyrics. This is a form of heresy and will erupt in a brawl if everyone doesn't show "proper respect" to the band who gave us Free Bird. This is especially true if alcohol is present. (Notice I didn't say
"sold at this event," but "present.")

Yes, we know that Vulcan is mooning the entire city. It's not that funny to us anymore.

If you ask someone for a "coke," they will often ask you, "What kind?" This is not a trick question. Tell them what you want: Sprite, Dr.Pepper, Root Beer, etc., it is all "coke."

All tea is sweet. If it's not sweet, you are in a Chinese restaurant or have crossed the Mason-Dixon Line.